The High Seas of Friendship....

So I have this friend. Lets call him Mr X for now. Until we find a suitable nickname for him. I'm perturbed with him at the moment, so naming him now would end up with his having something snarky written in sharpie on his nametag forever. Barnacle Bill comes to mind. But I digress...... So Mr X is your typical perfect guy. Sort of. He is brilliant, successful, handsome, and still young enough to turn heads. He is perfect...... on paper. 

See he has this secret. No it's not a mole in the shape of Oprah, or a third nipple or anything like that. It's way worse. He has barnacles. He has serious barnacles. And the most frustrating thing about it is that even though he swears he doesn't *want* barnacles..... he still accrues them way faster than he removes them. Now I know what you're thinking... WTF are barnacles?!? No it's not something you have to go to your doctor and get a cream for. Unfortunately there is no cream. Barnacles are those people in your life who are there for the ride. They attach themselves to you for their own gain... getting all the goodies but doing no actual work. In reality they are adding to your weight, and if not addressed will sink even the strongest boat.

Now one or two of these annoying fellows can go unnoticed... but barnacles multiply.... quickly..... and before you even realize it your hull is coated with them. And then you have to pull your boat out of the water and apply some old fashioned elbow grease to remove them. Ok yeah.. we are doing a whole boat metaphor here people. Just in case I've lost anyone........... Ok so back to the muddy waters of metaphor-land... (I crack me up)..... removing these suckers... well... it sucks. It's hard. And it's one of those things that you really need to be committed to doing. And I really thought he was. Until today.

There I was doing him a favor... minding my own business.... (ok maybe I was being a little nosy).... and I found something. I'm pretty certain he didn't buy that for himself..... (certainly not in "pink"), so I know who he bought it for. And I know why (V-day is coming soon, folks). He has been vehemently denying that she is a barnacle... that he would allow that... he swears he's been sooo gaurded against that.....

And yet there it was. Staring me in the face. And I realized something big. You know when you have that one friend.... Everyone has this friend... who is constantly complaining about their partner, or their job, or whatever, but refuses to change their behavior or their situation, right? The friend you love but want to bean over the head with a 2 by 4 because you love them and you can clearly see that they have the ability to change the things they are complaining about, but they somehow just DO NOT see it. And they are destined to continue complaining about the results of their own actions (or inactions) forever... and ever.... until they finally get it.

He likes his barnacles. Or at least... he's not as ready as he thinks he is to get rid of them. Oh, one or two, sure, no problem. But here he is.... creating new ones as fast as he's dropping the old ones.

So what do I do? Do I keep my mouth shut about my discovery, and just nod and smile as he rants about barnacles and how well he is doing ridding himself of them? Do I call him out on it, and watch enraged as his eyes glaze over as we have *that* talk yet again? Or do I just move on, accepting that *that friend* is an emotional barnacle themselves..... one that I certainly don't have room for in my life right now.

You can choose a ready guide in some celestial voice
If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice
You can choose from phantom fears and kindness that can kill
I will choose a path that's clear
I will choose freewill

- Rush "Freewill"